[at-l] Bear Repellent

[jbullar1 at twcny.rr.com (Jim Bullard)]

At 03:20 PM 11/3/2004 -0600, Shane wrote:
> > Joe says black bears aren't as dangerous as our fears make them out to be
> > while Shane and Jim O argue that it only takes one to kill you. Both are
> > correct. OTOH if I allowed all the things that *might* kill me to
>determine
> > what I did, I wouldn't do much of anything.
>
>Oh NO!  Don't you DARE come around here with your reasonable attitudes and
>well thought out points!  Can't you see we're trying to be adversarial?

Yeah, I got that. You're in one of your moods again, aren't you?

>Actually, all I'm saying is that I don't walk around in the woods terrified
>that a critter of any color is going to come eat me.  I know that the
>incidence of being eaten by critters is low.  I also know that the incidence
>of being eaten by critters goes up dramatically the closer you get to said
>critters.  To talk about statistics is simply silly at some point.
>
>Not too many kids get run over by cars in the street every year, yet all our
>mothers holler at us to get out of the street.
>
>Joe's contention is that cars - that is to say bears - just aren't
>dangerous.  I wonder if he'd let his toddler lope off towards a bear of any
>color and say, "It's OK.  Bears aren't aggressive.  Little Joe just wants to
>pet him.  It's perfectly safe.

I get that in his post at all. He was just saying that they aren't the 
lucking menace many people including Bill BRYSON (see, I remembered his 
name) think they are.

> > Actually being frozen in fear all the time might kill me too. ;)
>
>Hypothermia is a bear.
>
>Wait...  I'm mixing my metaphors again, damn it.
>
> > I respect any animal that outweighs me and/or has sharp teeth even the
> > domesticated ones.
>
>I like to use the skull crushing test.  If it's big enough to crush my
>skull, then I'm going to leave it alone.  It lives there, I'm just visiting.
>
> > Should you encounter a bear, as advised in "The Restaurant at the End of
> > the Universe, DON'T PANIC! Panicking is one of those stupid things you can
> > do around bears. Make yourself as large as possible by raising your arms
> > over your head and shouting loudly. "GO AWAY" works although anything will
> > do. Bears don't speak English anyway. Blowing a shrill whistle works fine
>too.
>
>I like to just talk to the bear.  Introduce myself.  Recite a little poem or
>two.

What sort of poetry? Do they like haiku or more Western tradition rhymes?

>This seems to have absolutely no effect on 'gators, though.  Or skeeters for
>that matter.  Oh, and snakes.  I actually like snakes.  Tastes like chicken.

Gators I respect (both the weight and big teeth thing). I wouldn't recite 
any poems to a gator. Skeeters (other than the one on this list) don't hear 
anything. They are to busy humming and saying "I can't hear you" all the 
time. I talk to snakes. "Tell you what snake. You leave me alone and I'll 
leave you alone".