[pct-l] Christmas Trees

[wayneskraft at comcast.net (Wayne Kraft)]

Here Comes Santa Claus


Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus,
Right down the Christmas tree aisle
While Lonetrail?s pup is dumping something vile.
Saws are revvin?, children screamin?
Pretty scary, this sight.
Run like heck and say your prayers
'Cause Santa Claus wants to fight!


Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus,
Right down the Christmas tree aisle
He's got chain that's filled with teeth
For Lone and Fido, too!
Hear that saw chain rumble, ramble,
Oh what a scary sight!
So jump in  the car and lock the doors
'Cause Santa Claus wants to fight!


Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus,
Right down the Christmas tree aisle
He doesn't care if you're man or dog
He?ll slice you just the same!
Santa Claus knows we're all the devil?s spawn
And he?s gonna make you lame!
So fill your hearts with Christmas dread
'Cause Santa Claus wants to fight!


Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus,
Right down the Christmas tree aisle
The saw swings round and voices cry out
That Santa?s mad again!
There?ll be no peace at Home Depot
?Til the poop disappears from sight!
So lets get out the mop and pail
Before Santa Claus wins the fight!



On Dec 19, 2005, at 3:17 PM, Lonetrail@aol.com wrote:

> Last year I went Christmas Tree Shopping and almost was beheaded by  
> Santa
> Claus.
> My 120 pound German Shepherd and I went into Home Depot to buy a  
> Christmas
> Tree in Home Depot  parking lot.They had Santa with his long beard  
> and red
> outfit cutting the  trunks off trees with a chain saw and wrapping   
> them in the
> spin/wire device. As I when by he was signing Ho Ho Ho Merry Merry   
> Christmas.
> I picked out a tree I wanted and got in line to have the tree cut and
> wrapped. Just as I handed the tree to Santa my dog pooped a very   
> loose liquid mess
> about two feet in diameter in  Santa's work area.  Santa went  
> berserk and
> chased us with his chain saw.  If he would have  caught us it would  
> have been a
> massacre; he would have killed both of us. As he  was chasing us he  
> would rev up
> the saw. I was afraid to look back. I can  thank God for my hiking  
> the PCT I
> was able to out run the fat slob Santa  Claus. Security was called  
> and they
> were going to make me pick up the poop. I  said I would have if  
> Santa would not
> have tried to behead me I was afraid to go  back in. They then  
> called the
> manager who reluctantly told Santa to  pick up the poop. As I  
> walked away I sang
> Ho Ho Have a Merry Merry Christmas  Santa.
>
> Lonetrail.
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