Re: [at-l] Relationships and the AT

[DaRedhead@aol.com]

In a message dated 2/5/99, 10:09:06 AM, tvanveen@accmail.umd.edu writes:
<<Does the goal-oriented, independent, adventuresome attitude that a would-be
> thru-hiker acquires cause marital problems?
> Or, does marital (or relationship) discord bring about these changes in a
> person?>>

Or, it's really both a and b, at different stages.  Picture this:

Studly loves to hike.  Studette does not.  She is a little less independent, a
little less confident, and not all that crazy about hiking.  Studly wants to
thru hike.  This causes marital discord.  Possibly a divorce ensues.

Then - after the divorce, Studette starts becoming independent of necessity,
and this brings more confidence - then Studette starts hiking to prove
something to herself, and finds out she loves it.  Thus, these wonderful
changes are brought about by the discord.  Suddenly, she is the happy,
confident, adventurous Studette and loving it.

Then Studette meets a new Studly.  This Studly doesnt hike much.  Studly is
jealous and possessive.  By now, Studette is planning a thru hike, and Studly
doesn't want her to. Studette doesn't want to give up her new found
independence.  This causes marital (or relationship) discord.

Hmmm. . . this could go on forever, potentially.    I'm not sure what the
point is.  Just that both answers are correct, depending on which role you're
in at the moment.  And I think that the AT, and the desire to thru hike, will
do one of two things.  Point out how lucky you are to have a great partner who
loves you enough to support you in your dream, is not jealous of the time you
spend hiking, and cheers you when you reach Katahdin (or Springer).  OR -
magnify any serious flaws in the relationship a thousand-fold.  This is just
my fifty cents.  But I think it just proves Jim and Ginny are the perfect
couple <g>.  They are out there doing it together.  That's the way it should
be, ideally.

The Redhead
Ga > Me  00
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