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RE: [at-l] A White Blaze Christmas

T'was the night before Christmas
And all through the house
The whole dammned family
Was drunk as a louse.

Grandma and Grandpa were singing a song
The kid was in bed flogging his dong
Mom was home from the cathouse
I had got out of jail
We had climbed into bed for a nice piece of tail

When out in the courtyard I heard such a clatter
I leapt out of the bed to see what was the matter.
As I crossed to the window, I dropped my flask,
Threw open the shutter and fell on my ass.
When what to my bloodshot eyes should appear
But a rusty old sleigh and four mangy reindeer.

There was a tough little driver holding his prick
I knew in a moment that bastard was Nick.
Slower than snails his coursers they came,
He cursed and he screamed and he called them by name.
Now Prancer, now Dancer up over that wall,
Quick now damm you or I'll cut off your balls.

Then up on the rooftop he stumbled and fell
And came down the chimney like a bat outta hell.
He stumbled and staggered and made for the door,
Tripped on his beard and fell to the floor.

I heard him exclaim as he rode out of sight.
Piss on you all.  It's been a hell of a night.
* From the Appalachian Trail Mailing List |  http://www.backcountry.net  *