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[at-l] Hobble report

Well, I'm virgin no more.....
I've done some miles on the AT, here and there.
But since those miles have been day trips,
I still felt the trail was virgin to me.

Last night I slept with my head just seven feet from
a white blaze for the very first time.

Actually, very little hiking was done.  While
packing the car, I omited  two new pieces
of "gear".....my crutches :^(  Hey.....they were't
on my 'master list' <G>   It's probably for
the best since the blesoe boot _does_not_bend
at the ankle.  Very unstable, I propably looked
like I'd spent a night at the Doyle, stumbling about.

As I pulled into the trailhead parking lot, an officer
flagged me down and asked "Hiker or Angel?"
I replied Hiker, but he didn't believe me (because of the
Dreaded Bledsoe) and made me park in the Angel's lot,
which was, of course full.  I followed the other cars around
and around in circles, waiting for a spot to empty. As I passed,
one fellow hollared, "Ya gotta get here by 5AM if ya wanna get
a good spot.  Finally it was my turn to park.  I gathered my gear
and started my long hobble to the trailhead.  Halfway there,
I realized I had not  made a mental note of where my van was.
Was it section D or E?  I thought the row was 28, but I wasn't sure.

I knew I was nearing the action when I spotted a hiker
sprawled on a pile of rib bones.  Soon another, lying prone,
his belly distended, still gnawing on a watermelon rind...
so sad......
I heard a commotion and looked up towards the trail.
The angels were restless...a murmur passed through
the crowd.  "A runner's coming, a runner's coming!"
In a blink, all the angels piled plates high with their
best freebees and lined up single file, arms extended.
As the runner sped by, he snatched what he wanted
from several plates
A horrible vingnette played out right befor my eyes. Two
hiker's were working the stands in the Steak Aisle.  A
fight broke out between two angels and they were rolling
around in the dirt.  One was screaming "T-bones"
The other"Delmonicos."  While the crowd was distracted,
the hikers dumped the Ramen and StoveTop out of their
food bags and filled them with steaks.  An AT cop was there
in plainclothes, posing as a hiker and whipped out a tranquilizer
pistol and put them down on the spot.  A women nearby told
me that they would not be harmed, but would be relocated
to the CDT so they could learn to fend for themselves again.
The whole incident was _very_unsettling.  I knew they'd
be better of in the long run, but still, it seemed sooo cruel.

Well I've taken enough of your time so I'll close with these
rumours I heard.  There have been reports of a large man,
with long hair and a  long beard and an especially engaging
grin, kidnapping hikers.  I guess that's actually hikerknapping.
Now this is only rumour mind you, but they say he takes
their packs away from them and dumps them on the trail.
But the wierd thing is, he picks them up again later and gives
them their packs back.  It seems that after several days of this,
the hiker's become confused and start saying weird things
like No more pack, no more pain. Bet yer boots I make it to Maine.
The thinking is, that it's some weird kind of mind washing.....
remember Patty Hearst  ?
Anyway, the AT Purist Society has established a fund in hopes
of ransoming these hikers back to the purist's ranks.  All
that remains is to determine the price.  Probably be prreeettty
hefty.
Also there is talk of another hikernapper.  This one has actually
been_spotted_ slipping big stuff bags over hiker's heads while muttering

"It's my birthday and yer comin to my party."  Yikes...it's scarey
out there.

That's enough for now....I'll post more later.  Just gotta tell you
about
the PUR sponsed concert at the shelter.  Without my crutches, I
couldn't actually make it all the way there, but they had an awsome
sound system and I could hear it just fine from where I slept with
my head just seven feet from a white blaze for the very first time.

Flames will be ignored so ya might as well send them to hotbeans!!!

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