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Re: [at-l] Damascus, VA

Sounds a little bit more excitin' than Trail Fest, Felix, but I ain't sure
I'd wanna be at Trail Days if you're bringing your ferret.

Highlander

----------
> From: Felix <AThiker@smithville.net>
> To: AT-list <at-l@saffron.hack.net>
> Subject: Re: [at-l] Damascus, VA
> Date: Saturday, May 02, 1998 1:45 AM
> 
> Slyinmd wrote:
> > In a message dated 98-05-01 16:48:21 EDT, raven@gwu.edu writes:
> > << I'm pretty sure this is JUST a diner. But whatever you do, don't
mention  Dot's name in front of Felix, and don't even try to get 
> breakfast there
> >  during trail days. Guh. >>
> > 
> > I believe they do have cabins or rooms there, along with food and beer!
 What
> > about mentioning Felix's name in front of Dot?  Would that put you on a
spot?
> 
> Here is a repost of last year's Trail Days events. (Remember, any place 
> it says "Mrs. Felix", insert "Hiker formerly known as Mrs. Felix") BTW, 
> its frightening how much of this story is actually true...
> 
> Well, here's kinda the way I remember it...
> 
> A bunch of us were up by the pool playing "Make the bottle stick to
> Snail-no-more". Mrs. Felix was over at Dot's doing what she does best.
> Woodelf and Chase were working on their "Who's on Third?" routine for the
> talent show. Schuyler was carrying water from the river to the pool,
> muttering "I hope I win a new pack tonight". Gweneeth was trying to
> figure out if she has a girl dog, or a boy dog. Mark and Janet Holmes
> were trying desperately, and nearly successfully, to distance themselves
> from the group. Sandy Dee was busy taste-testing everyone's beer. Raven
> was shooting crows with a sling-shot. Mike was trying to teach the local
> school kids to pronounce his trailname, but gave up when he realized they
> could barely pronounce his real name.
> 
> It was my turn to stick the bottle to Snail-no-more, when he passed out.
> Its no fun stickin a bottle to someone layin down. Thats when I went to
> the truck and got my ferret. I learned a long time ago that you can have
> one hell of a good time with a stopwatch, a young ferret, some dental
> floss and a ping-pong ball. So I was explaining the game to everyone when
> up runs Sleeper94 and says "Come quick, there's trouble at Dot's" So I
> put the ferret in my pants (which is where it goes in the game) and we
> all hightail it over to Dot's. Seems Mrs. Felix was trying to order
> breakfast at 9:00 in the morning. Dot tried to explain that they don't
> serve no breakfast at 9:00 in the morning. This didn't set well with Mrs.
> F. Chairs were flying, glass was breaking and blood was flowing.
> 
> We were trying to seperate the frakus when in walks an officer of the
> law. He asked what the problem was and everyone tried to explain at
> once. Finally, he said "Dot, I've wanted to shut your brothel down for
> years, but had no grounds. If you ain't servin breakfast at 9:00 in the
> morning, I got no choice but..." Thats when he stopped and looked in the
> direction of my pants. "Son, whats going on in your pants?" "Same thing
> thats going on in yours, Sir"
> Right about then, the ferret caught the ping-pong ball. That wasn't a
> good thing. "I think you all best come with me."  Interestingly, they
> took us all back to the pool. Seems thats what they were using for the
> holding tank on this festive weekend. Already in the pool were all sorts
> of long-haired, tie-dye wearin', bongo-bangin', hacky-sack-playin',
> drunkin' revellers. They made all of us get in the pool but Raven. They
> apparently had never seen a purple-haired girl before, so they made her
> sit on the diving board. All the grade-school kids walked by and looked
> at the new prized possession.
> 
> Our situation looked desperate when up walks Needles.
> "Officer," he says,"I have a bit of information that I'm sure you want.
> And for the freedom of my friends here, I'll tell you"
> "Thats an awfully gutsy move, boy. It's also illegal"
> "I'm just tellin' ya that I know something you want to know." After
> several minutes of wheeling and dealing, the two leave the pool area.
> About this time one of the school kids saw one of Raven's tattoos and
> went running through the streets of the town screaming "I'm blind!!!! I'm
> blind!!!"
> 
> Next thing we know Needles comes in to get us, sans officer. "What'd you
> tell him Needles?" Needles simply turned to watch the police car pull
> away, a nude Waldo in the back seat...
> 
> 
> 
> -- 
> Felix 
> Quote of the Week: "Your water's on fire!!!"
> Quote of last Week: "The black ones taste like licorice."
> Stop and see me at:  http://members.tripod.com/~Felixhikes/index.html
> 
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