[Date Prev][Date Next][Thread Prev][Thread Next][Date Index][Thread Index]

[at-l] Fear And Loathing on the Slackpacker Tour



As reported by The Bamaman:

April 2, 1997

	Woke up, loaded van, didn't do dishes.  Me, JANE, PETE and the mystery dog
head to Battle Creek, Michigan.  Slackpackin Tour takes big deTOUR.

	Arrive Battle Creek, met by short, fat, balding guy named George "Buddy"
Foster and ACCOUNTANT.  ACCOUNTANT had said "sign here" two maybe three
days ago.  I signed there and now I'm here in Michigan - the cereal center
of civilization with JANE and PETE and the MYSTERY DOG.

	What happened next is best described in the following NEWSPAPER CLIPPING:

Battle Creek, Michigan

		USDA / SLACKPACKER PRESS CONFERENCE

	George "Buddy" Foster USDA procurement specialist announced today that due
to a recent cancellation he is now able to offer all interested backpackers
an unlimited supply of berry-flavored desserts known affectionally as
"Berry Surprise."

	Buddy was joined at the crowded press conference by a man identified only
as "Mr. Slackpacker" from PA and his new bride "Jane."  Mr. Slackpacker had
reportedly just signed a lucrative contract with the USDA to distribute
Berry Surprise to hikers along the entire length of the Appalachian Trail.

	"I have renamed my journey along the trail, THE SNACKPACKER TOUR."  Mr.
Slackpacker was heard to shout above the constant chatter of the press and
clicking of the still cameras.  "My new bride, JANE has thoughtfully
volunteered to curtail her long-planned hike to drive the SNACKVAN to each
and every trailhead and road crossing from Suches to South Arm to
facilitate the distribution process !"

	Suddenly a mystery dog barked as a man known only as PETE packed the final
container into the bright red van.  The Snackpacker and JANE made their way
through the crowd and up to the front of the van - soon to be joined by
PETE and the MYSTERY DOG.


April 3, 1997

	Woke up, did dishes, began Snackpackin Tour of the Trail.	Me, PETE, the
ACCOUNTANT and THE MYSTERY DOG all weighted down with Berry Surprise.  Will
meet JANE soon to resupply.

The Bamaman 
David S. Severance
sevy@kezarlaw.com
visit the Ossipee Mountain News Hiking Page at:
http://www.conknet.com/~d_severance

* From the Appalachian Trail Mailing List | For info http://www.hack.net/lists *

==============================================================================