[at-l] Arguably the Most Important Gear

[janl2 at mindspring.com (Jan Leitschuh)]

Ah, I love head stuff!
;-)
I asked many similar questions, and got rich answers from this list. I
look forward to other answers.

<Most of the thruhikers I've talked with mentioned that 
> there was a specific low point to their trips, when they had just about 
> had it.  This low point seems to me to claim a lot of would be 
> thruhikers, when another mountain view just doesn't do it anymore (for a 
> little while at least), when it seems the rain will never let up.  Yet 
> they kept going and enjoyed, in many cases, months more hiking.  That's 
> the kind of hiker I want to be.

Then you likely will be.

Though I would question my hike from time to time, I never once wanted
to quit. Not once. I'm not sure why that was, but I never did.

I heard one woman wishing aloud for a broken limb, fer cryin' out loud
- so she could "return home with some dignity." 
I found that just shocking. Why hike if you feel that way?  "Hiking
the AT" is just a concept. Getting up every morning in the woods,
walking, looking, socializing, sweating, eating, sleeping, inhaling,
exhaling, that is the reality. Feeling alive. Anything that deadens
you - is it really worth doing?

Though I never wanted to quit, there WAS a time, though, when I
thought I would not be strong enough to make it. 

I had a serious physical crash near Catawba, VA. It had been
sweltering, tropical, the day I had been pushing hard up toward
Dragon's Tooth, trying to get to the hostel by 6pm. I thought I would
get there by 3, and now it was nearly 6. Thunder grumbled on the
ridge, furthering my haste.

Though the profile didn't look bad, the terrain kept rising, lots of
little hills, slowing me down. Everyone else had gone on. I was the
last one on the ridge. I was so slow! My shoes were too narrow in the
toebox and were killing my feet, to the point of bone pain as well as
raw spots. There was little water on the ridge, and I was nursing what
I had. I was probably in some heat stress. By the time I got to the
hostel, I was just cored.

When I got up the next day, I nearly fell down. Everything ached like
the flu had hit me. I tried slacking six miles back to the hostel from
the post office, and that about melted me. Everyone left me in their
dust on the first hill. I got back to the hostel an hour after the
rest. The ride out again was waiting on me. 

I was completely demoralized. I just couldn't pick up my pack and head
back out to the Trailhead with the others. I just could not do it. I
did not have the strength. It just didn't look like I was going to be
physically strong enough to hike this trail. No one else seemed to be
in any distress.

My mistakes: I pushed hard in the heat, then did it again the next
day. I had inadequate water. I also let my head do a number on me.

I had just zeroed three days earlier and thought "I can't be zeroing
all the time if I want to get to Maine!" Don"t think that. If your
body needs rest, believe it.
I also thought "everyone is stronger than me, I can't keep up." 
Don't do that to yourself either. 

Later in the hike, I saw far stronger, faster, younger folks getting
off the Trail permanently for various reasons. The constant rain and
wet was one, this year (someone said ATC told them this was an
unusually low-finishing year, does anyone know if that is true?). The
young 'uns could all outhike me. Yet creakier souls like me, or Hot
Dog, ended up standing atop Katahdin in September, without skipping
trail.

When I got back to the hostel, I ate lunch, drank alot of water, ate
some ibuprofen and fell hard asleep. When I woke about 3:30pm, I felt
a little better. I drank some more, ate more ibuprofen and some
supper. By 5pm, it was cooling of a bit. I thought I could make it one
simple mile to the Boy Scout shelter, the next.

 The hostelier, Joe Miller, offered me the chance to stay over a
second night. I looked at him and said quite seriously. "If I stay
over, my hike might just end right here."

I will always be grateful for his answer: "Well, then, you'd better
go." 

He kindly made a special trip to drop me off at the Trailhead.
When I discovered the Boy Scout shelter was half-dismantled, I walked
on three more miles, including up to the fantastic McAfee's Knob, to
the shelter after.

I really don't know the answer why I kept going on my lowest day.
Don't underestimate heat stress, dehydration, calorie deficit,
bone-deep foot pain, physical exhaustion. Although it wasn't illness
for me, it might be for you. Or some sucking news from home. Or an
injury. Maybe cut yourself some slack at those times.

I guess I kept going because I still wanted to. That covers a
multitude of sins. If I had wanted to stop, I would have gotten off.

WantedTo Shoe
-- 
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    	AT Journal:
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	Jan Leitschuh Sporthorses Ltd. 
	http://www.mindspring.com/~janl2/index.html

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