[at-l] Self Doubt (How to help a Newbie: Update 4 - Part II)

[shane@theplacewithnoname.com (Shane Steinkamp)]

Last Saturday, Bob asked me a question that was essentially a statement:
"Now that we're into this thing, I'm not sure I can do it."

Bob has two major character faults:  He undervalues himself, and he tends to
try too hard.  So, when this came up in the conversation I was not
surprised.  He is one of the most capable people I know, and if he starts, I
think that his odds of finishing are excellent.  It's the starting that's
hard.

I tried to answer his question by going into a long discussion of the
mindset of shinigurai - courage in the face of great danger - but I think I
lost him in the middle as I rambled on merrily.  (One of MY major character
faults, if you haven't noticed...)

I thought about it, and how to express my thoughts on the subject, and last
night I showed him a clip from one of his favorite movies, Braveheart.  The
clip is Wallace rallying the troops.  I don't think it is historically real,
but the little speech in the movie is inspiring.  His little diatribe was:

"I am William Wallace, and I see a whole army of my countrymen here in
defiance of tyranny. You have come to fight as free men, and free men you
are. What would you do with that freedom? Will you fight? ... [If you run,]
you'll live. At least a while. And dying in your beds many years from now,
would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that one for one
chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they
may take our lives, but they'll never take our freedom!?"

Then we went outside and I told him, "That's your choice now.  If you DON'T
go do this, and you wind up chained to your fate on your death bed, would
you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that one for the
chance to come back here now and do what you failed to do the first time?"

We discussed it, and in the end he said, "If God grants that I should live
to February 1 next year, I will start, and I will finish."  He shared what
he thought of as finishing.  He said, "I'm going to hike MY trail, and I
will know the end of it when I come to it.  What you said before, 'Your
experience is your success.' (Thanks Orange Bug!) makes perfect sense to
me."

I told him that was smart, since a trail - any trail - is just an arbitrary
line on a map.  If you hike the trail from Georgia to Maine, and you stand
on that last trailhead and look out across the distance, you will see that
the line on the map stops, but the territory of opportunity still stretches
before you in all directions.

So, does this make sense?

I have seen a lot of discussion about why thruhikers fail, but little
discussion of why those who actually succeed do succeed.

I know that for me, personally, it's that desire to see what's over the next
hill, around the next bend, or on the other side of the river.

I have never had any trouble starting, or finishing, but I'd like to hear
from somebody else what their experience was - not the physical or mundane
difficulties of what to do with all your stuff and the like - but the mental
self doubt that what you are doing is selfish or impossible for you to do.

Ok...  Enough rambling for now...

Thanks.

Shane