[at-l] Just punning around (NOT trail related)

[KellyGoVols@aol.com (KellyGoVols@aol.com)]

OK, don't drink and read... that's your warning.

Some friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small 
florist shop to raise funds.  Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the 
men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair.  
He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not.  He went back 
and begged the friars to close.  They ignored him.  So, the rival florist 
hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to 
"persuade" them to close.  Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, 
saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop.  Terrified, they did so, 
thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.

And......Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which 
produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet.  He also ate very little, 
which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad 
breath.  This made him What?
A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

And then there was a group of chess enthusiasts that checked into a hotel.  
They were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. 
 After about an hour, the manager came out of the office asked them to 
disperse.  "But why?" they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I 
can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the 
craft, it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat 
it, too.


Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal?
He wanted to transcend dental medication.

Two vultures board an airplane, each carrying two dead raccoons. The flight 
attendant looks at them and says, "I'm sorry, gentlemen, only one carrion 
allowed per passenger."

Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became 
a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never 
amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of 
two weevils.

A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a 
family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; 
they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his 
birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she 
wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! 
If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."

And finally, there was the person who sent ten different puns to friends, 
with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.  
Unfortunately, no pun in ten did!!!

Kelly




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