[at-l] I am not funny

[cballs@mindspring.com (Curtis Balls)]

Jan Leitschuh  wrote:
  > I've been pestering Curtis to join AT-L. I tole him I wanted all my
  > funny people on one list. I know, he didn't sound so funny. He
  > sounded Serious.




"Every side I get up on is the wrong side of bed. If it weren't so
expensive I'd wish I were dead." - John Prine

I want to put a stop to this notion right now. I am NOT funny! I am a
serious minded person with serious obsessive-compulsive behaviors and a
serious mortgage. I have suffered the slings and arrows. I have been
seriously, repeatedly disappointed in everything human. I have had
serious fights with my boss, and my mother and I saw eye to eye only
once for about a year. I am a serious food shopper. I have had root
canal. I had just one day of fun as a child when the hogs ate my
brother. I have a serious meat-eating cat. I have a serious 9 to 5 job
where my mind is slowly being colonized by microscopic aliens and
little pieces of my skin are peeled away, daily. I eat raw cactus for
breakfast. My meat-eating neighbors are serious, especially when
objecting to my Bluegrass music. I once spent two continuous hours
inside an art museum. I am always serious when I vote and have never
thrown it away frivolously on goofy people like Reagan or the Bushes or
Clinton but have made it count from McGovern, The Earnest to Ralph, The
Serious. We live in uber-serious times. I have blood-type Q and my DNA
indicates genetic descent from carpet tacks. I bathe with sandpaper and
motor oil. I have been accused of being a Pagan which is a untrue. I
too have spoken with Elvis. I have serious creditors. I owe my mother
some serious money. I laugh out loud only while asleep. I am intensely
gray haired and used to be seriously handsome. I take no prisoners. I
walk the line - alone. I will never be taken alive. My trailname was
"Leather Grits."

Curtis, The Gritty



--

 - Posted via http://forums.backcountry.net