"Me too" to OB's post re [at-l] hiking situation changed?

[sloetoe@yahoo.com (Sloetoe)]

--- Orange Bug <orangebug74@yahoo.com> wrote:
> I've been thinking about this all night, even while watching Groundhog
> Day on TBS.
### A great movie all the way around. And a tremendous subject to mull
over.
### Without taking up bandwidth on the entire post, OB put his finger
squarely on the pulse of things, line by line.

### Moving things around just a little, OB wrote:
> I don't know much about you, but I suspect your father knows a bit (or
> thinks he does). I'd guess your father has heard your hopes to hike and
your disappointment over the decision to postpone. 
1)does he have an agenda; Money is never without strings attached. 
He has offered you financing to make it happen.
### When I *formally* announced my decision to throughhike (I was in high
school, but I'd spent most vacations "out there" year 'round), my mother
(a Baggins) said she'd not support it unless I went *with* someone.
(That's a hoot -- I'd already gone *winter* backpacking solo...) My father
(a Took), in contrast, said he wasn't sure about the advisability of a
solo AT throughhike, but he knew how I felt in 'wanting to do something
like this' before schooling, debt, and family requirements got in the way.
He'd always wanted to 'go to sea' in a small boat. (And it was Dad who
took us [primitive!] family camping in the White Mtns, and it was Dad who
would pile us in the car to drive *against* traffic to go stand arm-in-arm
on the beach in a hurricane...)
### To borrow from OB, there are many Katahdins, and your Dad may really
like the idea of you're being there, and might not forgive himself if he
didn't help *you*, his son, make the attempt. If he didn't make *his*
Katahdin, at least he might help you make *yours*. Your Dad's only
requirement of you may be that you make an honest effort of it.

> Please feel free to ignore this free advice, but I encourage you to sit
> down with your father and discuss the trip, the finances, your goals,
> and your relationship with him. Then shut up and listen to him before
> making any decisions. I suspect you will find that there are lots of
> Katahdins, not just on the AT.

### And then, if you do go, and you have that day/week/month when you
DON'T feel that:
> > "You'll thruhike when thruhiking is the MOST IMPORTANT THING
> > you could possibly be doing at that time.'
...you might find yourself walking emotionally naked into town, nothing
left, too depressed even to be pissed at the fourth straight day of
unrelenting rain, wind, and leg-sucking mud. You might phone up the
homestead, get ol' Daddy on the line, and say "This SUCKS. I wanna come
home." And he might say "Son, you've walked xxx miles up mountains with a
backpack in the cold and wind and rain, and I'm really proud of you. Hang
on, a bus ticket's on it's way." And you might hear that pride (and maybe
a little sympathy) in his voice, and it may strike something you hadn't
thought of as a reason to carry on, and you may say "Dad, well, shit, hang
on, Dad." (And you may never have said "shit" to your father before...)
"Dad, let me just get to the next town north. Let me get there, and I'll
call, and you can send the ticket there." And maybe that's all you'll need
to carry you on, and on, north to Katahdin.

### There are reasons to quit every day; the trick is to balance the
reasons to carry on. Sometimes it's as guteral as "I will not stop." My
own mantra at one point was "I will not make it to Katahdin *today*." I
woke up every morning, reminded myself of that, and knew that if I said
that each morning, and carried on, that one day I would be wrong. Perhaps
it is that knowing that your Dad has such an interest in your trip will
one day be all that stands between you and a bus ride home.... 

### Talk to your Dad. Talk about the likelihood of failure. Talk about the
payback requirements. Talk about *why* he would want to make such an
investment. And do listen. And do listen to yourself, too.

Happy Father's Day,
Sloetoe




=====
There is little use for the being whose tepid soul knows nothing of the great and generous emotions of the high pride, the stern belief, the lofty enthusiasm, of the men who quell the storm and ride the thunder.

T.Roosevelt 4/23/10

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